Bible Teaching

Calvary Temple Teaching Library

Two Become One Pt.3

Amen. Let's turn to Matthew's gospel, we'll pick up where we were Sunday morning and just allow the Lord to minister to us. I've heard a lot of rumblings since we started on this subject. Some of you old folks are mad at me from Sunday night and those different areas. We're in a place of really trying to identify in all of our lives-remember why we started this teaching, and how we're relating to the wisdom of this world, that's what this teaching's all about. Are we people that are living by faith, walking in the spirit, living from the Tree of Life, or are we more influenced by that Tree of the fruit of the Knowledge of Good and Evil; humanism, secularism? What in our lives is out of order as it's pertaining to our fulfilling the will and the promises of God? We were studying-we saw as we talked in the relationship thing, and we'll get into the practical parts as we continue through, but the Scripture says it's not good for man to be alone. He tells us why and we realize the necessity of two becoming one flesh.

So let's turn to Matthew's gospel, Chapter 19, and again refresh our hearts with the Word of God, and remembering the Pharisees that come to the Lord tempting him. Their motive was not pure, they weren't wanting to know the truth and they were just wanting to try to trip him up. [Verse 3] "...Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?" They were looking for a way to justify their position. One of the positions that were being very strongly held by Hillel at that particular time was a perversion of biblical truths which is the authority of the man, prominent position of the man, and even until recent times outside of Christianity, women were seen as chattel, they were seen as property of men. Jesus, of course, debunked that, defused it, and revealed the truth. The Holy Spirit, through Paul's epistle, revealed the truth that it's not male or female (Galatians 3:28), amen? This body of Christ that we're in, we realize the unification of what God's doing in bringing two together, making them one is to bring that healing, that wholeness to man in the spirit, and that completion that was lost when God saw that Adam needed a help meet. I think it's very interesting to see in God's wisdom now what is it that caused God to take something that was within him already and remove it so that he could have it. Is there something about that being outside of man that's even more beneficial to him than being in him and part of him? I believe that there is, and part of that was, it's not that we have wisdom. Some people say, "I don't need a mate. I have wisdom, I have perception." It's that he wouldn't be alone. He wouldn't be lonely. He would have a companion. He would have that strength of two being better than one that the Scripture teaches us. Those are all part of the things that are revealed in the wisdom of God as He made woman for man.

They wanted to know if you can just get rid of your wife for any cause. Our society today would say yes, and tragically, most of the Christian churches today have adopted it. The divorce rate within the churches, Christian churches, is not a whole lot different than the world today. My question is this: why can't Christians stay together? If you say Jesus is Lord, if you sign a covenant in the name of Jesus Christ, if you don't prefer yourself, if you're not selfish, if you're not self-willed, if you're not self-serving, if you're seeking the good of others, if you're ready to lay your life down, if you're even ready to love your enemies, then why can't you stay together? How many of you think that's a fair question? Except for the cause of adultery, Christians cannot break their covenant of marriage. Can you say amen? Period. So you'd better watch out who you marry, because you're stuck. Amen? Until what? "Until I get tired of this. Until I don't like the way you comb your hair. Until I don't like the way you treat me. You're not treating me fairly. You're not showing me the attention you used to show me, whatever it might be. You're not earning the income that others are earning. You don't look the way you did thirty years ago." Or like my Dad used to tell my Mom, "When you turn forty, I'm going to trade you in on two twenties." That didn't happen. They stayed married for fifty years.

What is it that causes these unions to be broken? I'm not going to get into all the specifics right now, but what causes them to be broken is the exact opposite of what causes them, or should cause you, to come together in the first place, the desire to serve that other person, to make them a better person, to get them to heaven. When did you lose that vision of getting your husband or your wife to heaven? What decisions did you make contrary to that, to sowing, to preferring, to edifying? I'm saying this, young people; it's not about taking, it's about giving. When God's called us to be united in the spirit of Jesus, in answer to that question, you can't just blow this thing off. This is not a light contract that was made here based upon secular laws. For what God has joined together, say it, let no man put asunder. I don't want to get distracted right now, but I just want you to see though, there are civil laws, the secular perspective. In reality, there is no marriage that doesn't recognize the authority of Father. Pagan marriages, false religions, are not in the true covenant sense, one. That's why it's so easy for these things to be defused. "Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." How much are we influenced by secularism? How much have we been influenced by the wisdom of this world? Now, some of you have been married, divorced through different circumstances in life. We're talking primarily about two believers who have come together; we're not talking about your before life. We're talking about after you've been born again, you've become a new creature, and in covenant under God's authority, for God's glory, you're joined and two become one. That's for life, that's forever! It's not a small thing. We've shared [that] it's the biggest decision you'll ever make outside of making Jesus Lord. You know, the wedding vows that we used to give that have been for a long time, it's not to be entered into lightly.

We realize that today so many things are just entered into lightly, just almost a trivial type, "We'll try it out," and that's the world. Christians, probably most Christians, aren't approaching it that way, at least not consciously, but how affected are we by the society that we're living in? Gauge everything on this: it's once for life, that mate that God brings to you. "They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put your wives: [Okay, I want you to see it again] but from the beginning it was not so." God's best. God's will. How many of us, even here, are living in this particular place, in many ways deceiving ourselves, thinking that we're pursuing God with all of our hearts, saying we want God's best, but then, when it really comes down to making pretty weighty decisions here, we begin to prefer ourselves, our situation is special, whether it's us or our children? This subject we're getting into, as it starts touching children and spouses; it gets pretty touchy, doesn't it? I talked about the other day-I've heard back, some of you were offended by the fact that I said you're not the cream of the crop. I heard some people [say] that were offended, "Pastor said that we middle-aged, unmarried people aren't the cream of the crop." Most of you are not the cream of the crop. I stand on my statement. What I was saying when I said that, and I'll share with you, it doesn't have anything to do-and the reason some were offended, they think we were talking about personality, or even appearance. That's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about understanding what marriage is. It's for the glory of God. The reason so many of you are still single is because, for some selfish reason either somebody wasn't good enough, you're too good, you've got unrealistic expectations, you can't be bothered, "I'm an old bugger now, and not going to change so who wants to put up with me?" Whatever it is, you're blowing off God's best. God said it's not good for man to be alone. Amen? The question I have of you is if you are alone after all of these years and you don't have the gift, why? I'm not saying it's sin, but I am saying don't deceive yourselves in so many areas and thinking, "I'm pursuing God with all of my heart, and I want everything that God has for me as it long as it meets my little package, my plan, my preferences, my comfort zone in life, my established place in life right now. I can't change, I've been this way too long."

I beg to differ. I will present evidence called Steve Gardner. I never thought Steve would get married. I've known Steve since Methuselah was twelve, and to see the change of his heart. I've known Steve for a long time and have a pretty good idea of what makes him tick, and to see the change in heart, and the diversity of the gifts in what God was doing in his life, and as he was fulfilling-if anybody had the gift, he had the gift. The reason I knew he had the gift was not just that he was single, but with all of his time in his singleness, he was serving God and ministering to our young people, and blessing our young men, and emptying his life out 100 percent for the kingdom. That's how you know somebody's got the gift. And God changed his heart sovereignly for a purpose and brought about a fulfillment in his life, and now with his help meet, and his children, and this fullness as he's continuing now to minister. But he'll tell you there's a price that's paid. There's a price that's paid when you take a wife, even though the Scripture says to let those that have wives be as though they have none, as that's relating to ministry and different things. There's a price that you're paying together as you are now following your call and your preference of others in the kingdom of God, and there's things that take away from what would be normative (if you want to call it that) living so that we now as a unit are emptying our lives, and offering our lives up for God.

I'm a little bit off track of where I want to go, but just so that you could see [that] I'm not saying by being single you're in sin. I'm saying that by being single you're missing out on God's best if you don't have the gift. Now some of you, and we see this gift is not something that's forever, it's grace that enables us to serve, to be complete, to be whole, to not have that other need outside of the Lord, and the ministry of companionship, and all of those different things, so that we can effect the ministry that God's called us to. Some get the gift afterwards. They've been married, they've become a widow or a widower, and God will give them the grace sufficient so that they can give themselves to ministry. Paul set up guidelines, and I'm off course, but let's go through with it for those that are widows, and he said those that are widows in deed, requirements that they have washed the saints' feet, etc., and he said the body can care for those, but the younger, "Well, I just want to serve, and I want to be a part of this." Paul says, "No. You tell them to go marry because what's going to happen is they're going to come and start serving some, and then you're going to be distracted, and end up married again." (1 Timothy 5:3-18) Why? Because that's natural, that's normal. But some of you who have been married and you meet the age requirement, and you meet the character requirements, and you don't have to have been married, but I'm talking about you're into these areas, and you're in that category, God can give you those gifts and those graces to fulfill this. But it doesn't mean you use your life on yourself. It's being poured out for the kingdom. Those are all some important aspects to search your own hearts.

Now, let's go on a little bit because I want to get into Genesis, a specific subject that I wanted to address tonight. But it's so important to realize that it's all about glorifying God, it's all about serving others, serving the community through that one individual, the spouse primarily, where two become better than one. "...because of the hardness of your hearts...And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away does commit adultery" (Matthew 19:8-9). He gives the specific clause. Now as Christians, and there's a separation, and there are different times when Christians are in conflict, etc., and there's separation, they have one option: to be in the perfect will of God, to be reunited, and anything other than that is not to perfect will of God. You're going to miss God. You're going to be in sin. You're going to cause others to sin. I won't spend a lot of time on this right now, but there're a couple of different teachings, and some teach perpetual adultery. I don't believe that's a biblical principle. I don't believe it stands up to the blood of Jesus, to God's grace and the provision that we have for complete awareness and participation in the blotting out of the handwriting of [the] ordinances that were against us. There's not one sin that just hangs over us for the rest of our lives, even though we by faith are still saved and get to go to heaven. That's not a scriptural principle. Some who have taught it over the years, I believe, taught it to try to put teeth into the Bible-it has enough teeth-because of the lack of care for the glory of God and the sanctity of marriage, and so they wanted to give more teeth to it. It doesn't need teeth. Jesus can speak for Himself and He made it very clear, there is no reason for two believers to separate then, the Scripture says, except for adultery, and then it doesn't say you're obliged, it says you have the right, but he actually says in those cases that you're under no obligation. It's very important for us to see the sanctity, the holiness of this union, not to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly, but soberly, and discreetly.

So here we are faced with this challenge in the Scriptures that it's not good for us to be alone. Now the majority of us would say, "Amen!" and "We're looking for somebody!" We began to talk about what those requirements were, and we talked a little-I'm trying to go back to which service it was in my mind, and we began to say the infamous list, and we began to say to you, and share with you the other session that that list-let me say it this way, there is a list, and it isn't yours, okay? The list is in Galatians, the fruit of the spirit; that should be your list. (Galatians 5:22-23) The requirements of a wife, what you're looking for are in Proverbs 31, that's what you're looking for. You'll see some of the character traits of who you want as a wife in this passage we're getting ready to go to in Genesis that will be a blessing for you. We sit here and we say, "Oh, praise God! I'm free from the seduction of the world. My mind has been renewed, praise God!" and it's still there, the tendencies are still there. Now when I say list, don't mistake what I'm saying. I'm not saying that we don't all have preferences. I'm talking about the things that we have as priorities that are not spiritual, that are not character. I'm talking about the things that the world holds dear, that it holds as preeminent; the reason that we would be united, the reason that we would pursue a particular individual. We've seen in the time that we've been doing this study that it's based on selfishness.

Now let's turn to Genesis for just a second, and this very classic chapter that we use so often on guidance, I think also speaks to, very clearly, on faith in believing and trusting God for a life's mate. The reason that so many of us stay in a position of confusion is we just don't have faith in God. We think it's our job. "I've got to go hunt somebody. I've got this list and as I look at it, I'm always just like the Lord; my eyes are going to and fro." Some of us have those wanted posters that we're passing out. I like-we've all seen renditions of it, but we've seen it of course around the racing and stuff, and it's great. You see this ad; I don't remember how this thing starts, but just say its like, "35-year-old male looking for wife with race car." It talks about some of the different traits and different things and at the end it says, "Send picture of race car." Right? You know there are things that are very important to us as we're pursuing these relationships, and some of us are distracted by the race cars, by the pictures. I think it's always interesting to me these guys that go on-line and they get these things, and there's this picture. It's probably some old fat guy on the other end. You don't know who you're talking to. You hear these stories of people having these conversations and all of these different things, and the humor of what the world and all of their loneliness, and all of their lusts, and all of their insecurities are looking for, and we already have what they're looking for. We have the presence of God; the promise that He'll never leave nor forsake us. Peace He gives to us, not as the world possesses. Those things that are so available to us and we're looking outside of the spiritual, looking for some type of temporal secular fix that's going to make it all right, and make the loneliness go away, and it's not going to happen. It's going to be in contentment in His lordship.

Chapter 24, let's see if we can get this thing tonight. [Verse 1] "And Abraham was old, and well stricken in age: and the Lord had blessed Abraham in all things. And Abraham said unto his eldest servant of his house, [make a covenant with me. That's what it means when he says, "Put your hand under my thigh." That's the way they would make an oath with one another.] And I will make thee swear by the Lord, the God of heaven, and the God of the earth, that thou shalt not take a wife unto my son of the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I dwell:" Now in this particular passage we're going to see a number of things that I want to refer to. Be not equally yoked with unbelievers. "...Come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you" 2 Corinthians 6:17 tells us. We're a special people, we're a covenant people. We can't marry outside of the lordship of Jesus Christ, and we saw how it's not wise to marry outside our ability to walk in agreement with one another, not only as Christians, but in the pursuit of how we've been taught, our understanding of the Word of God. If you can consider anything else than what's been taught to you all of these years, then you've not been indoctrinated. If what you've been taught, that you say you've believed, and the Truth can be blown off for a relationship, then you've not been indoctrinated. You've been fooling yourself and you don't believe anything that you think you believe. Because where our treasure is, that's where our heart is. If our treasure is in these things that we've said are truths in community, in the ministry of body to where we prefer and serve one another, and we see that as God's greatest expression of love, having the same care one of another as we've taught the community, and our lives being intertwined, and if you can so easily just blow it off to go follow after somebody, you've never believed it, it's never been real to you. I'm saying that to challenge some of you to ask yourselves right now that question, "What do I believe, really?" Remember, that's what this study's all about. "What do I believe? How much have I been influenced by secular thought?"

The thing that Abraham speaks here that's very, very clear is you are not going to bring one of the Canaanite daughters in here to marry my son. Now remember, the Canaanites at this particular juncture-this is the land that Abraham is going to possess. It's not his homeland, it's this land of promise that he's moving into and possessing it little by little as the Lord goes before him and makes a way as the angel of God has gone and driven out the enemies, and as Abraham is prospering and God is honoring, that every place he puts his step is being given to him. What he's saying is, "You've got to realize one thing, I'm in it, but I'm not of it." We are possessing this thing, but we're still surrounded by the effects of worldliness, of carnality, of paganism. We can't partake of that. We're not of those folks on the job and in the neighborhood. We're a peculiar people, a holy nation, a royal priesthood, the Scripture says. (1 Peter 2:9) How separate are you in your heart and in your mind? How do you see yourself, the call that's on your life?

"But thou shalt go unto my country, and to my kindred, and take a wife unto my son Isaac. And the servant said unto him, Peradventure the woman will not be willing to follow me into this land: must I needs bring thy son again unto the land from whence thou camest?" There is no returning back to the old life, amen? The whole call to Abraham was, "You leave that and follow Me." We know the story, and I won't get distracted by it right now, but he left everything but what? Lot. And we know the whole scenario of that. He said, "No. There's no going back." This journey we're on, beloved, there is no going back. There's nothing of the natural that we're holding to. I'm going to show you how this affects us because-listen-some of us have that tendency, and I'm going to be going to Hebrews (I guess not tonight) to where we're still being influenced by our cultures, by our family traditions, and I'm not talking about things that are necessarily bad, but I'm talking about the fact that we can't go back. God's leading us into some paths of separate living, of uniqueness. That's what we're talking about when we're talking about protecting ourselves through living in community, when we're saying that dating is not the best thing that can be done. We didn't say it's a sin to date, we said it's stupid. It's not wise. Some of you still date, and we're saying it's not wise. There're some of you that are older and you're saying, "Oh, he's talking to the young guys." There's some of our older, older singles that are off somewhere alone at different junctures. It's not wise. We have the community dating. "Well, we're going out as a group. I like her, he likes her, and we go as a group." That's not a group, that's a double date! As we look at these different things we're talking about just preserving ourselves and protecting ourselves, and the way that is used to be done doesn't make it right, and the fact that it's so accepted in the society that we're living, doesn't make it the best. We're after God's best. So he says, "You don't go back." Whatever you do, you're not going back. We're going on, we're not going to do it the way it's been done all of these years of us growing up, because it's not the best. We're following He that's invisible. We're seeing a path that's being blazed in faith, and righteousness, and holiness, that's keeping us free from the sinful lusts, the youthful lusts of the world; the natural tendencies of man. We all need to be protected from ourselves, and that's part of what family's about, and the community, and all of these different things.

So it says in no way do you ever go backwards, we're going forward. And he says, "Don't you remember that God said He was going to give us this land, and He would send His angel [verse 7] before us, and you'll take a wife unto my son from thence? But you will not bring my son back there again. If she doesn't follow you, forget about it, but don't take any other path than the supernatural. God's going to make a way." You see, Abraham's moving by faith and his servant right here, doesn't understand. Abraham is so detached. "Well, what if this, and what if that?" And Abraham's trying his best to answer the man's questions, but what he's basically saying is, "God's in charge; just go do what I'm asking you to do." The story goes down (and you're all very aware of what's taking place) and he went down to Mesopotamia, and the whole story that took place here in Rebecca's life-let me see if (and I don't want to get caught up because I don't have time to develop each aspect of this right now)-the faith that God is ordering our steps. We've talked about the patriarchal role and the parent's responsibility in this, and to this point we've seen all the dads doing high-fives, "Yeah! I'm in charge, bless God! You don't do anything unless I say it! I've got this thing under control!" And we spoke towards this Saturday in the men's fellowship, and we said, "Yes dads, you are the authority of that household, but you're designated authority. You're a steward, you're not lord." Let me just share something for all of you dads right now. Those kids aren't yours, and those of you that have it all planned out, and you're in charge, and you know best, I want to tell you something, you're just a representative of Jesus to those kids. Jesus is their Lord, not you. That's hard for us to swallow many times as parents, and we seem to think that we always know best, and we're always going to be the one that has the Word, and that's not so. You're going to be the one that has a final statement in these things, but you're going to have to realize one thing, and I want to point this out for you dads so that you'll begin to prepare yourselves to be the best father, you can to be able to speak wisdom to your young people, don't draw your wisdom from your past experiences. Don't think that you have enough wisdom now to make that decision when that thing arises. You need to be walking in faith and asking God to give you understanding of this new realm of experience that you're getting ready to walk into. If you've never been there before, this is something that's going to take faith to be able to make these final determinations by the grace of God. So we're saying this, you're under-shepherds. Those children are not yours; they're Jesus', they've been bought with a price. We expect our children to obey, and remember this, however: children obey your parents, say it, in the Lord. There's a very important passage, and that's what I want to refer to in Genesis. You remember when they asked Rebekah if she would go. Do you want to go with this man? And we said it wasn't about the child having the final determination, though it is. She had the final say; she could have said, "No, I'm not going." What if she had said no in light of this situation? Would dad have said, "Yes, you are?" See, that's the difference between arranged marriages, and for lack of a better term, what we would call as orderly marriages, dads being the priests of their homes and the authorities of God's representative to that household.

But as I shared in the Saturday meeting, we as leaders are not totalitarian, we're servants, we're stewards, and we're representing the will of God and the best for our children. If we're going to be loving parents, then we're not looking to inflict our will upon our kids. We're looking to make them happy. We're looking to find out where their hearts are. If they're old enough to get married, they're old enough to have preferences, they're old enough to have heard from God themselves, they're old enough to allow all of these principles, and there shouldn't be a lot of conflict. When we're talking about these things that are happening, there shouldn't be, "Well...," and all this. When your child comes to you; or someone comes, so many times if it's done orderly, if it's of God, it's just a, "Praise God!" and it's a signing off on the thing. That's how it should be here in our midst as we're being trained and raised up. Tragically, it's not. Why? Because we're all at different spiritual positions, because some of them that come to ask for your daughter's hand are carnal, and you're not about to give your daughter off to someone like that. You know, I hear the gossip too in the deacons' meetings. That's where I catch up on all my gossip. Some of the gossip from last night's meeting-they came in, and to use some of the terms that we've used over the years, the "throwing your hat in the ring", the, "bumping into somebody", different terms we've used over the years-they talked about this one guy who was planning on throwing a hat and bumping and doing all this stuff, and I made the comment to the guys, I said, "I don't get it (and I've shared it so many times) how can somebody be so blind to who they are?" I step back watching these lives, and I watch this life over here, self serving, carnal, lustful. I see this young person over here pursuing God, praying, serving. What makes this person think there's going to be any reciprocation? How can you sit back-and I think the tragic thing is sometimes we know our own hearts, though we just kind of judge ourselves by our intentions, or we think more highly of ourselves-but we sit back and somehow think we should have that because it's our desire, because it would serve me best, because I mean, look, they're spiritual, they're attractive, they're a character-yes, and you're not!

What makes you eligible? Hear what I'm going to say: be more spiritual than the person you want to unite with. Go into that thing being the one that can help, that can lift up hands that can hang down, that can edify; that can speak words of encouragement. I'm talking to you guys primarily right now, be on fire for God! Don't be looking to take a wife; be looking to serve Jesus, to edify the body of Christ, to wash a sister with the water of the Word. Don't be looking for what you can get out of it. What are you putting in to becoming Christlike so that you could approach any father in this congregation, and they'd say, "Man, I've been waiting for you to show up; I started to send you an e-mail!" There should be no question. Now, that gets us back to asking Rebekah what she's going to say and dad's preferences. Dad, can I share something with you for just a minute? You're already married. We're not looking for who you would marry, we're looking for who your child's going to marry, and they're not clones, and you have no right to impose your will on them. You are the representative of God's will. Amen? "Well, what do you mean? My way of doing things is right, it's always right. It's always best!" No, it's your preference and your child may not prefer to go the way you're going. "Well, yes they are, bless God! I'm in charge here!" You see, what you're starting to create is a schism instead of drawing your child to yourself. You're not only setting up an immediate problem, you're setting up a long-term problem, and all of that time that you've worked to communicate and have a relationship with your child can be messed up in this one part of their life if you're not wise, and if you're not seeking God.

Children, obey your parents what?-In the Lord. See, the one thing that you can stand firm on, dads, is, where is the character, where is the fruit of the spirit, where is the fruit in their lives, where is this godliness? Now, you may have other preferences, you may have other plans, you may have all of these other things, but unless you can stand before your child and say, "This doesn't meet that biblical requirement," then you need to be very careful to step back and go, "Okay, now is this just one of my preferences, is this something in my own wisdom?" But the thing I have to realize is this child is not mine. They belong to the Lord. I'm a steward. I'm looking to prepare them, and I'm talking from a father's perspective that has a daughter tonight, and we'll try to speak from both areas. But you've got to understand what we're doing. We are not raising female engineers. We are not raising successful female business women. We are not raising the first woman president. It might be a good idea in lieu of Hilary, but what are we doing? Listen, it's very simple. God's plan for your daughter is to be a wife, and to be fruitful and multiply, and to raise up a godly seed. Number one, that's their goal. That's what they're going to be. What do you want to be when you grow up little girls? "I want to be an astronaut." "I want to be a doctor." "I want to be..." All little Christian girls should say, "I want to be a wife. I want to be a mom, a godly mom. I want to raise up a godly seed." That's why God called you. How influenced are we by the world's thoughts? Why then? Why so much preparation, so much planning for careers and standards of living? Please don't misunderstand what I'm saying-1600 on your SATs to run a vacuum? You all have known me long enough to know that I make statements to make points, okay? I'm trying to make a point. Of course, they may go out and work in the workplace for awhile. They may work after they're married for awhile, until there are children. They may work after the children are grown to a certain age. Don't misunderstand what I'm saying; I'm for education.

Do you see what we're really doing here in this kingdom and what should be emphasized in our midst, and what we should be looking for as the primary emphasis in our children's lives, with these other things being secondary? And I think very frankly that some of us have it backwards. Some of us, we get accused by the world, it's tragic, but so many of us, many of you who are wives and keeping the household are looked down upon by our society. There is no higher calling then to love your husband, love your children, and keep the home orderly, and raise up a godly seed. So what is it that we're emphasizing in our own midst, and what are we preparing ourselves for? Hebrews says it this way: Our fathers chastened us after their own pleasure but God for our good. (Hebrews 12:10) I would encourage you dads just to be as good as our Father is. What is it that's for our good? Not what pleases me the most, that gratifies me, that satisfies my perspective on how things ought to be, but what does my child want? What's going to make them happy? Being what God's called them to be. We're talking about [the] preparation of some of our young people as they grow and begin to look this way. Let's talk in these last couple of minutes concerning, again, some of the older singles in our midst. Can you say that you're experiencing God's best? What do you think influences you most greatly to have you where you are at this time? Again, please, we've made comments-when I talked about the fact that many of you are not the cream of the crop, see, my perspective of the cream of the crop are the people that are doing the will of God-and it's not good for man to be alone. And if after fifteen years you still haven't got that one done, then how can I say you're the cream of the crop? You know what I found, it's not always the case, but many of these things carry over into other areas of the lives. If you were mad at me before, you're going to really be mad at me after I make this statement. It's not a blanket, it's not everybody, but many who find themselves in that place are the same ones that are out running and playing, and gratifying themselves, and everything else, and not being poured out for the kingdom of God, and not serving, and not pursuing death to self, multiplication of fruit into the kingdom of God, and that's why those around you that are getting married, they're gravitating toward one another because the other ones are doing the will of God, and that's what attracts them.

And for whatever reason, and I'm not speaking toward anything, but I'm sitting here, and I'm still single at forty because I'm looking for this certain woman. She isn't here, okay! "I'm looking for this voice." You aren't going to hear it! "I've got to have this feeling." It's not coming! Haven't you figured that out yet? "I enjoy going and running with the guys and hanging out and playing, and I prefer to go fishing, and whatever" in other words, to serve yourself. "Well, you know the fact is the women around here aren't good-looking enough." Have you looked in the mirror? Who are you? And let me ask you a question. So that I can have this extra fishing trip or whatever, I've got a sister over here who's not experiencing God's best in her life, that I could bless and be a companion with, and edify, and comfort, and care for, but I'm preferring myself because they don't meet my exact 10-item list? That's what I mean when I make the statement. It's all on character, it's all on what we've been called to do, and it's not good for you to be alone. If I could, (and we're finishing with this for tonight) if you would be able to step back and look at your own hearts, you're not happy, you're not content, you're not fulfilled, you've battled with the different temptations that come with this, of excesses in one form or another, of gratifying your own selfness in what you do, what you think, what you buy, where you go. I just would encourage you to ask yourself, if God said it's not good for me to be alone, why am I alone? Somebody said every time we do a teaching like this, everybody thinks they've got to get married this week. That's not what we're saying. Some of you didn't hear the last statement I made on Sunday night. I said do not leave here and harass these young ladies, and a couple of you did. And thank God for the fathers that said, "Hey, don't even think about it." I really just sense in my spirit, I don't know if you can understand, there's such a stronghold of traditions, of the need to trust God like Abraham did, and to watch the angel go before and supernaturally bring this thing to pass. And you see two great (and I'll finish with this for tonight) two great principles in this story that stand out. One is Rebekah being asked, "Do you want to go? Is this what you'd like to do?" And the answer was, "Yes," and after all these great supernatural confirmations took place, she goes, and the Scripture speaks and says in verse 63 of this chapter, "And Isaac went out to meditate in the field at the eventide:" [I wonder if you'll find your wife while you're praying and meditating on God, and not looking for it, and believing that God's working it? Interesting, isn't it? I wonder how fearful he was, to wonder, "What's coming back?" Is that scary, or what? Dear God! I bet he was praying, "Lord. Lord, look at the list, just one of them, Lord." Well, the way we are, we wouldn't go for one. "Lord, I don't have to have all ten; nine Lord, nine." (Just like Abraham, right, in intercession?) "Eight Lord. Seven. Just one Lord, just one on the list!" See, because we truly believe that God wants to do us wrong and give us everything we don't want in life. Is that what you think about your Father? If you are able to trust Him, He'll give you your hearts' desires, and you don't really know what you want or what's best for you!]

And as he was prayerful and meditating, it says, "...and he lifted up his eyes, and saw, and, behold the camels were coming. And Rebekah lifted up her eyes, and when she saw Isaac, [this is not a Scripture that permits smoking] she lighted off the camel. For she had said unto the servant, What man is this that walketh in the field to meet us? [Now, you know we have an advantage over Isaac here, we know each other. We know who each other is. We know the strengths, the weaknesses, the families, the histories, all of these things, and I'm speaking that in a positive way, not in a negative way. We know these things, and it brings a comfort to us. Here's a young man and a young woman, never have seen each other. Who is this guy?] And the servant had said, It is my master: therefore she took a vail, and covered herself. [Modesty, humility, discreetness, a meek and quiet spirit] And the servant told Isaac all things that he had done. [Can you imagine him hearing this story for the first time? Now see, some of us, guys especially, would be more interested in getting to the tent, and that's the problem with too many of you. You're really just way too taken up with getting to the tent. Isaac took time to hear what God had done for him, and how his steps were ordered, and that this was the will of God. Isaac was not moved by her beauty, though he appreciated that when it was seen. Isaac was moved by the fact that this was the will of God. I love that passage, and the servant told Isaac all things that God had done, and how He had worked this thing out. There is nothing more satisfying than knowing you're in the will of God. This is God's person. Doesn't matter what they look like, this is God's person. It doesn't matter whether or not there're immediate personalities, or emotions, or feelings, this is God's person.] And Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah's tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife; [say it with me, and what?] and he loved her:"

When you're in the will of God, love is the natural consequence. How can you not love somebody who loves Jesus with all of their heart? We need to dismiss all of this other peripheral stuff. Just as some advice to you young men: I would pursue and love the one that loves Jesus the most. I want to be with the person that loves Jesus the most. Not the one that I think would make me look the best, satisfy me. Is that where your heart is? They had never even seen each other, what a love story by the Spirit of God.

Father, we just thank You for Your Word tonight. As we face the powers of the world that every day we contend with, airbrushed models that appeal to the lustful eye of man, all these single men in here, every day being inundated with air brushing, lies; images. "That's what will make you happy. Put this treasure on your arm; that will satisfy every need." It's a lie of the devil, and it's not where we live-and the world, it's about how we look, and how we dress, and where we live, and romance. In the Word of God it's about the will of God, two becoming one. It's not good that you're without a companion, without somebody who can edify you, without somebody that can speak into your life the wisdom of God. Many of you who are single adults here and you've been single a long time, you've battled a lot of different things, and experienced a lot of wounds, and scars, emotionally, spiritually, because you haven't had somebody to stand with you. Just ask Father tonight for His will to be done in your life. Can you die to your own preferences and self will and false images? Now, Father may want you to stay alone, I can't say that for you. I'm just challenging you with the biblical, the general biblical principle. And you know, the most I can tell as I look, and I believe is right, the main reason is you just think you deserve better than what's available, and that not only promotes yourself in your eyes, it diminishes God. What you're saying is, "I deserve better than this. These folks are so far beneath me." You're judging God, is what you're judging. He put you here. He put you where you are at this time in your life. "Yeah, but I'm not settling, bless God! I'm going to hold out until I get my will." How tragic. "Yeah, but nobody here turns me on. Nobody here lights my fire. Nobody here meets all of my requirements." Okay, but there are some people here that could use your gifts if you would seek the kingdom first. In the state you're in, you don't deserve anybody. But I'm talking about if you just humble yourself, and repent and seek God's best, then you're worthy to become a help meet. Your eyes will be opened you'll see things differently and you'll be able to edify the body of Christ, be edified in return, and God will be glorified. Father, make that real to us we ask, in Jesus' name, amen.

Let's stand before the Lord. It's late; we've gone late in the last couple of services. I think the emphasis tonight, even though we've entitled this two being one, I've just felt very strongly tonight for some reason, we keep trying to go back into it, and I'm not saying that I sense that we've got marriages on the rocks, but just in my spirit, we've so diminished the sanctity of this covenant. So I want you to see that as I'm talking about the fact that we don't have to have feelings, and these lusts, and all of these great gushes; that we can by faith, marry. And he loved her. We can love the Jesus, we can love the character. What I'm wanting you to see tonight, and I just want make sure that you're hearing what I'm saying; we're not trivializing this thing at all. We're not saying, "Well, just go ahead and marry somebody." No, this is a covenant for life. But two people that give their lives, and try to out give their lives to one another, can't help but succeed. Jesus will be glorified. Grace and faith will manifest. And you'll know a love that goes beyond anything that's in the soulical realm, or in the erotic realm. It will bring a fulfillment and a joy and a strength that nothing else can, so don't settle for less than that. If you want to not settle, don't settle for less than that, praise God. Before you go, turn to somebody next to you say, "And He made two, one." Amen! Go in peace, God's love go with you.

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