Bible Teaching

Calvary Temple Teaching Library

You've Heard It Said Pt.7

Hallelujah! Amen. Let's go ahead and turn back to Matthew real quickly, Matthew 5. Let's see if we can pick up where we were this morning dealing with Jesus' teaching. If I can get myself out of trouble for saying, "women are evil," or at least qualify it. Chapter 5, of course as we're looking at Jesus' teaching here, the greatest sermon ever preached, verse 27, "Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. [And the same with the right hand.]" We've talked about this aspect of it, and looking at the wisdom of God as it pertains to walking in the spirit, that sins of the heart are just as offensive to God as sins that are actually acted out. The consequences don't always necessarily affect others, they may not reach as far in the natural, but it's just as great an abomination in the heart of God because we're going to give an answer for every idle thought and every word--idle being that that's non-productive for righteousness for the Kingdom of God. We know that as a man thinks in his heart so is he.

So we're talking about heart issues, dealing with the heart and as it pertains to this, and we've spent quite a bit of time and I don't want to go back in review to the place of getting bogged down again, but talking about the casual look versus the look of lust, the committing of adultery in our heart, and we said it all has to do of course, with the condition of the heart at the moment of the look. "A man that looketh upon a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery... already." We made definitions today of when that is adultery, when sin is conceived and we realize then that it is a matter of heart condition: You commit adultery with God before you would commit it against your covenant spouse. So we dealt with a lot of those different issues. We left off on that statement, I think we did, somewhere along the lines. We were talking about out of Proverbs; let's turn over to Proverbs 5 and 6 where we finished for this morning. We were talking about the need ladies, for you to protect your husbands in this day that we're living; to be that gift that God made you to be for your husband, for your spouse. Remember ladies, why you exist: "It was not good for man to be alone," amen? Adam was created first, the man, and then the woman. The man was not created for the woman; the woman was created for the man. So the existence, you exist for a reason, you exist for the man. It isn't real popular in natural circles, we've been so brainwashed in our society today that we've totally lost sight of the biblical positions and distinctions between man and woman. The Bible clearly draws these lines of demarcation. We're not talking about worth; we're talking about order and position. We're talking about the service to the Kingdom of God and the glory of God.

So it wasn't good for man to be alone so God made woman from the man. These two were made one, and they were naked, and they were not ashamed, the Scripture says. So we see then that in this relationship--and when it talks about them being naked, we're not just talking about their physical being, though that was the case, but the fact that they were clothed in righteousness, they saw each other through the glory of God and the presence of God; there was no schism between man and woman and there was no schism between God and man. What caused the shame wasn't the physical makeup, but the sin that caused the breach between God and His creature and between man and his woman. Because from that day on man and woman have been continually at war. When I say at war, I mean in conflict. They were made to be one and work in perfect harmony; these two parts that are opposites worked in absolute perfect harmony, and now we're not in harmony anymore. We are two distinct emotional creatures, intellectual creatures; our minds, we all know the physiology, our minds don't work the same. A man's mind and a woman's mind don't work the same. I know what you ladies are thinking, "Guys' don't work at all!" So we realize we're totally, in the natural, distinct, and yet God says in marriage, we're to be made one again--biblical marriage, Christian marriage, in regeneration and union of marriage, that's as close as it can come to putting us back together again and walking in harmony and thinking alike and serving one another, and living, existing for one another, we call it love. And so this is what God is calling us to. The moment we're not walking in the spirit, we're going to be in conflict; if we're not in the spirit we're going to approach things from two different perspectives, we're going to be at war, we're going to be in conflict, we're always going to be questioning instead of edifying.

So here we are called to be one. Ladies, we're talking about one of the things you can do to help your husbands. We talked about the fact of realizing the environment we live in. I made a comment this morning about women being evil; just to clear up what I meant: guys, women are evil, okay, just want to make it clear. Now why am I saying that, really? I'm making that statement to try to cause us to refocus; when I talk about women being evil, I'm talking about the children of Eve, I'm talking about the usurper, because we're going to read in just a moment, divine order: women are not to usurp the authority, and it's evil. Yet that tendency to manipulate and get control through all of the methods of womanly wiles is evil, it's a sin against God, it's a sin against the order of God, it's a sin against the very purpose for which you exist. The reason I talk about it being evil--stop and think with me if this isn't correct. For generations now here's what we've been told: Men can't be trusted, men cause all the wars, men are bad. Women are compassionate, kind, good, gentle, nurturers. Men are bad, men are rapists, men murder, men cause wars, men suppress. So we have these two views and I make that statement because, very frankly, many of our young people have been raised up, and whether we'd like to think it or not, we live in Sodom, we are vexed, and we need to come back and realize that women are just as evil as men, okay? We've lost sight of that.

So when I talk about this, I'm wanting to warn some of you dumb oxen. "Yeah, but my Mama's always been nice to me." Yeah--Mama! There is a vulnerability because of the maternal nurturing to where men trust women and so when they begin to flatter, and they begin to take them with their eyelids, and all of these things, your husband, who you send out to work to bring meat, bring money, is going out, many times, into society as prey. So we talked about you then, your jobs, this morning [and this will be the last bit of review] where you are to seduce your husbands; they are to be ravished with your love. They are to find you the most beautiful creature on the earth. How can you send them out in the morning looking like the wreck of Hesper? So we realize and we talked about you want to sleep in your sweats and fuzzy socks, and combat boots, and all these things; your husband just went to bed, and they just had a Victoria's Secret commercial on; he turns over, and G.I. Joe is in bed with him.

We're looking at these passages and the Scripture told us in Proverbs, Chapter 5, verse 19, "Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; [to you, let her be as that beautiful creature, and elegant, and sexy]. Let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished [seduced, enraptured] always with her love." So this is how you then relate, but instead, we face something in reality like this, don't we? We go to work, men go to work--that's part of the curse--and we live by the sweat of the brow. We're living in a society, now, where there is much more idle time available, and we're not just going to talk about that. Let's even talk about where there are different double-income households. Look what's happening, how we're being torn in our relationships with one another, why men are becoming susceptible. Now the ladies are out on the job, the ladies are encountering other men who are finding them attractive, and who are trying to in many ways manipulate them, and they are being flattered, and these different areas, and we have it coming from both sides in our society. In other times we have the man going away, he's at work, the woman's doing whatever it is that's going on during the day. He comes home from work, she's meeting with the ladies to go run in the parking lot, or she's meeting with the ladies to take the kids to this function or that function and whatever it is. The time that you now have--there's a segment of time, men, when you are going to be away from your wives, it's just necessitated. Ladies, there are those times when they are away and if you're like, "Praise God, it's so good to have them out of the house," and these different things, you are in trouble, and you are not, you are not the gift that you made covenant to be to your husband when you married him. "Well, he's just so much work." What did you sign on for?

We realize then that when men are coming home from work, the wives are going and doing something else, and they are hanging with their friends, and they are doing all of these kind of things. When are you together? Because I want to tell you something, when these relationships are built, and friendships are built, and intimacies are built, and communication is built, and when you're walking down the mall and you're talking together, and you're fellowshipping together, there's not the time then for freedom for him to be looking around and checking out all the other ladies. "You just don't understand. How could he be doing that?" Well we're having to get a squeegee and wipe your drool off the shoe store window because you're looking in there and lusting after all of these things and looking at dresses, and looking at shoes, and looking at pocket bags, and he's looking at women. You all are getting quiet just because I'm telling how this thing goes. What am I saying? I'm saying we need to start looking at each other; we need to start building relationships, that's what this passage is saying to us and making it so clear. Two are to be one, we're walking together; we're communing together, fellowshipping together.

Let me get out of these passages in Proverbs here by finishing over in Chapter 6, verse 27. We saw that whorish women are out there, they are out there hunting for your husbands. "Lust not after her beauty in thine heart; [verse 25 says,] neither let her take thee with her eyelids." Verse 24: don't let them flatter you. Ladies, we said the thing that should be very, very important to you, something that you need to start doing is what, what did we say? You need to flatter your husbands! Men want to be told how great they are, how strong they are, how good of a provider they are. We're going to talk about the other side of the coin. Men, your wives need to know the care that you have for them, the love you have for them. They need your gentleness, they need to know the fact that you are there, that they are your treasure. We were talking about romance today, the difference between men and women. Guys don't always get it about the candles and the soft music. Guys, you've got to understand, it's not even about the candles and the soft music, it's about the preparation, it's the thought that goes into it; it's the process. That's all part of it, but it's the process. You see, nothing speaks to your wife more about you caring, and loving, and thinking than the fact that you took time to think about them, you took some effort to think about them. You didn't Xerox a card on the way out of the office, but you put some thought into it, you actually read the thing! I read a joke the other day, they were talking about the fact that you need to read these things. This guy found this beautiful Valentine and all of the stuff they do on--oh no, it was the comedian thing again, the guy was talking about he'd given this to his wife and it said, "For My Husband On His..."--they want to know that you actually went in there and spent 12 seconds, you didn't just walk by, grab a card that was pink. You stopped and you read it, that's romantic, you thought about her, that's romantic, you sly dog, you.

Now some of you guys and the way some of you young men proposed recently and you made all of this preparation, and that's all romantic. The other guys are going, "Man, you're making a bad name for us." We talked about that in the deacon's meeting the other night, one of the deacons really did something nice; the other guys were going to vote him out. They're all in their, "Man Law; Man Law--don't be nice to your wife." But the women need to know that you're thinking about them when you're away, when you are encountering these women that are out there, the predators. Look, it talks about them being on the prowl, they are! It's dangerous out there! So what are you doing? Put some thought into it. Every morning when I get up and I go in to shave, there is on our vanity in the master bath, I was looking at those things, I thought, "I probably ought to do something," these old wrinkled up papers from all the steam and everything, two poems that I had written for Greer. Try to get those from her, ask her how valuable those are. The reciprocation, the concern, the love, the understanding of what it is that brings pleasure to that other person, this is what we're talking about, and guarding that, because if you don't, somebody will.

So we need to realize then that there is that woman that is out there flattering with her tongue, and it says, "Lust not after her beauty in thine heart; neither let her take thee with her eyelids. For by means of a whorish woman a man is brought to a piece of bread... Can a man take fire in his bosom, and his clothes not be burned? Can one go upon hot coals, and his feet not be burned? So he that goeth in to his neighbour's wife; whosoever toucheth her shall not be innocent." (Proverbs 6:25-29) So we realize then the need of keeping ourselves from those temptations, fleeing youthful lusts, abstaining from all apparent evil, that that would give place. So it's very important for us to understand these principles. I want to tell you something, you play with fire, you are going to get burned.

So we've tried to establish some of these principles, we're saying how do you do this, how do you go about these things? Turn over to Colossians for just a moment, we talked about walking in the spirit, and you won't fulfill the lust of the flesh. I made reference to this, but I want you to get the passages in your notes so you can spend time meditating upon it, but in Colossians, Chapter 3, [verse 5], "Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; [number one on the list is what?] fornication." This is what we're talking about; we're talking about fornication and how to protect ourselves from the sin of fornication and adultery. You say, "Well you know I can't commit adultery, I'm not married." Well if the other individual is that you're having an illicit relationship with, and I'm not just talking about physical relationships, I'm talking about flirting; I'm talking about drawing pleasure from the relationship that should be drawn from your wife. You see, that's one of the requirements of a bishop, that they be a one-woman man, is the Greek; that doesn't mean married to one woman, it means deriving all of this support, the strength, the under-girding, the helpmeet, the Hebrew says the helpmeet, the one who stands by your side and props you up--that's to come from one woman, not the women at work, your ego isn't to be stroked by the women at work. You're not to be fulfilled and it's the ladies that like to laugh at your jokes and your wife says, "That's stupid, why are you so dumb, man." Hey, it gets a laugh at work, huh?--a one-woman man. And the same in antithesis, as we hold this man up and we say, "What is it from the other perspective, how about the ladies?" "Oh, so-and-so is always so thoughtful to his wife, so-and-so just bought such and such for his wife, so-and-so has such a good..., and so-and-so is so smart, and so-and-so..." What is it that's got you so taken up with? This affection is to be toward your husband, the Scripture says; your affection, your love, your thoughts; your efforts solely toward your husband, the Scripture says. Husbands, totally for your wives, you love them, you lay your life down, you honor them as the weaker vessel, you realize their role of subordination, you don't speak sharply, the Scripture says, toward your wives, you're kind and the gentleness; and all of these things that will protect us against this force called fornication and adultery. Why? Because there is a relationship, there is that oneness that we talked about that God originally created us to have and bring fulfillment to one another, and not these conflicts.

So he says, "Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil concupiscence, and covetousness, which is idolatry: For which things' sake the wrath of God cometh on the children of disobedience: [He's not talking to pagans here, he's talking about people in the church. And he said these things are in us, these things are in our members; this is what we used to be until we were regenerated. And now we are new creatures, and now we are in the process of learning sanctification, and crucifying the flesh and walking in the spirit, but this stuff is still there potentially. He said, now remember, verse 7,] In the which ye also walked some time, when ye lived in them. But now ye also put off all these; [and then he gives us some more] anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy communication out of your mouth. Lie not one to another..." [One of the biggest lies you can propagate is, "I don't have any trouble with these; I'm not tempted in these ways." You may not be in every one of them, but in all of us, "In me that is in my flesh," Paul said, "dwells no good thing." The propensity is there, so we have to then constantly be putting down, and crucifying, and freeing ourselves from these things and seeking first the kingdom, all of these principles. So he says,] Lie not one to another, seeing that ye have put off the old man with his deeds; And have put on the new man, which is renewed in knowledge after the image of him that created him: [verse 12] Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; Forbearing one another," [etc. So the wisdom is, if it offends you Jesus says, "If your eye offends you, if your right hand offends you, what do you do? Cut it off, separate it from you. The wisdom that Paul gives us here, how do we then walk free from these things? You used to be under their power, but now we put on Christ. We begin to, as we were studying this morning, we begin to use our time in preparation for the things that are eternal and seeking the good of others, and all of these principles that will cause us to walk safely and not allow that power to overtake us, and we can go on and on.

I want to deal with one other thing here because we can spend forever just on this subject and I want to go on. But as it pertains again to some of the comments we made this morning and for our young people, turn over to Corinthians with me for just a moment and we'll segment some of this tonight, I do want to get moving along. But in 1 Corinthians, Chapter 6 he says--again he's going back to reminding us what we were and how we've come out from the bondage of sin, verse 11 says in this sixth chapter, "And such were some of you: [such what? Look at verse 9: fornicators, idolaters, adulterers, effeminate] but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God." So he contrasts lives and what it means to walk in the spirit. In the midst of this, he talks about us being joined together and the proper use of our lives for the Lord, he says in verse 19, "What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, [say it with me] which are God's." Your body and your spirit [say it again] which are God's. See, this is not your own; you can't do what you want with your body. Now, I don't want to get off course, but this has to do with the abuses of what we eat, it has to do with the abuses that many of us can have in not taking care of ourselves and just beating ourselves up unnecessarily, the hours, burning the candle at both ends, all of these different things, it doesn't seem to be a big thing, but we need to realize our body's not our own; we need to ask the Lord, "Do You want me...? You see, if I was aware when I was younger what I'm aware of now, I would have prayed this prayer, I didn't back then; I felt the Lord was leading me in another direction. But knowing what I know now about our physical being, I would have had to ask the Lord, "Lord, do you still want me to play ball, am I supposed to do this?" Because you know you are tearing this temple, this body, up. You see young men when they are through, they can hardly walk, just beat up, and we may do it in other ways, but we need to be very careful; I'm just trying to make a point, that we are not our own, we've been bought with a price. You can't take your body and join it to a harlot, it's not your choice; we belong to Jesus, the Scripture says.

So in the midst of all of this, in the context as he is speaking toward this, he says in Chapter 7, "Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me...," [now remember the Corinthian church was having some real problems, they thought they were really spiritual, they spoke in tongues, they had miracles. Paul rebukes them and says, "You guys are boasting in your spirituality and yet you have all of this perversion that's in your midst: a man sleeping with his father's wife, and you're not even doing anything about it. You need to repent; you need to take care of that sin." So in the midst of all of this there were things that Paul was addressing in his letter to the Corinthians, and he addressed those things, and they wrote letters to him and said, "We've got some questions to ask you." So he begins to answer their questions, here's one of the questions they had for him:] "Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me [I want you to understand something]: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time [agreed upon], that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency [your lack of self-control]." Tragically, so many, there's a number that think, "Who are these people, what's their problem?" Folks are folks; this is a biblical guideline for how we relate to one another in the community as believers.

Now, he said, "Realize this one thing, your body is not your own, it's the Lord's." If the person's body is not their own--we're talking about those that are not in covenant, in marriage, then it's sure not yours, you, the person who is interested in them. It's not yours to make decisions, determinations for it, to play with, to touch; to incite. When we talked about body, we're also talking about personality. Many of these things that we call flirting and all of these things, I want to tell you something. You're playing with God's property. It's no small thing to play and tempt and harm spiritually and emotionally, and in some cases physically, Jesus' property. It's not yours, it's not theirs; it belongs to Jesus. And then Jesus allows them, in the proper order, to present it to a covenant partner, these two become one, and these two belong to Jesus, and they are not their own. When it talks here about the husband's body and the wife's body not being their own and being that of the other party, it means of course, under the ownership of Jesus. So he gives guidelines in this; he's saying when this union comes together, this covenant's made, you're no longer a separate entity, there is a proper order, a proper place for this and the thing we want to address is found in that first verse, "...It is good for a man not to touch a woman," we've talked about that before, in the Greek that word means to kindle, or to set on fire, or to attach oneself to. So this has to do with emotional, it has to do with physical, it's not just a physical touch, it's the causing of some type of a reaction. So it's vitally important for us to see what he's making reference to because he says, "Nevertheless, to avoid [what?] fornication...," so he's talking about things here that if handled improperly outside of covenant marriage, are labeled as what?--fornication. So to excite someone, to cause a reaction in, is very dangerous. We've had people ask, "Why is it that over the years you've encouraged shorter engagements?" I'll tell you why, because the greatest temptation isn't when you like somebody and you're interested; the greatest temptation for you as young people and young couples is once you've agreed verbally to the covenant before God, and you've become betrothed, you become one, and it is a lot more difficult to stay apart when you are one. The greatest dangers come after the engagement, not before, and that's why we've always shared, it's a whole lot better off when you make that agreement, when you cut that covenant, these two become one now in the spirit realm, the contract is signed, betrothals are just as binding as marriage, and tragically, we've had to deal over the years here with couples who went into the engagement pure, but didn't come out of it pure. They went into the engagement holy, and pure and innocent, but didn't get married that way during the public celebration. In reality, based upon their betrothal, they were married when they came together, but their incontinence is something they have to live with.

This is who we are as humans, sexual beings. It's not a game, it can be dangerous, it can be destructive; it's a sin against one's own body. When committed in offense against others it can cause schisms that only by the blood of Jesus can ever be reconciled and healed, and in the natural man it can't be, Proverbs tells us, but in the Spirit it can, by the blood of Jesus it can, but requires a walking in the spirit and a maturity. These are areas that we can't just wink at, yet in talking to young adults many times and some of them it's, "Well, you know I don't understand. Why are you making such a big deal out of it?" Because the Scripture does, and it's very important for us then to understand these things. I won't get into husband and wife relationships here, it's a whole other teaching, but I might just say that the wisdom of Chapter 5, don't allow yourselves to be apart except upon agreed upon times for the purpose of fasting and prayer, is wisdom that you should follow, because to defraud one another, the Scripture makes very clear here, gives opportunity then for fornication to work its way into the life of individuals; fornication in many different ways, it may not be a physical act, it may not be physical adultery, it may not be physical fornication, but it can be evidenced in other ways, it can be in that lustful look, it can be in pornographic material, it can be in the unfaithfulness of drawing pleasure from those acquaintances at work and getting that laugh and getting that flattery from another woman. All of these things that are where we live if that man has not been seduced, ladies, by you; has not been flattered by you, he can't wait to get home from work to be with you. What are you doing to protect him, what are you doing to fulfill all of those needs in his life? "Well, what's his problem?" He doesn't have a problem. God said, "It's not good for man to be alone, so I am going to make him a woman." Amen? The man doesn't have a problem; we are exactly what God made us to be, amen? And he made for man, what? "With just a hundred pounds of clay / He made my life worth livin'." Look it up, it's a great song!

Now can it be wrong, can these things be inordinate, can they miss the mark in the way that the man is conducting himself? Yes, but we're not talking about that, we're talking right now ladies, about what are you doing to keep your man safe? "Pastor, what are you saying? Are you saying I'm supposed to be this seductress, I'm supposed to be this hot woman, and I'm supposed to clean the house, and I'm supposed to take care of the kids?" Yes, that's what I'm saying. Read Proverbs 31, amen? "Bummer!" Hey, I didn't write it! Check that lady out in Proverbs 31. So this is the role that we have. "Pastor, are you going to get the men?" Yes, Adam's Rib, we got them, and we'll talk about that here a little bit. We're going to talk about some of the inordinate behavior, but we're talking right now about what's in our lives, where we live daily. In the physical expression, this is one of the things that you don't know going into marriage, but all of us are not made exactly alike in our physiology, all of us in our sexuality are not alike; we don't all have the same sex drive, we don't all have the same testosterone and estrogen and the combination of the two that always balance the same way. So we realize we don't all have the same psychological makeup, we don't all have the same emotional makeup and so we come into these contracts and we come together and we're diverse at different times. The Scripture then addresses the diversity by saying, "It doesn't matter, there is not a right and a wrong as the fact that we are diverse, but there is a mutual responsibility to always fulfill your role and your relationship and the need of the other party," is what he's saying, that's your job! Now we said there are right ways to approach things. That doesn't mean, ladies, the guy's coming home and he's showing an interest in you in a physical way and you go, "Okay," you get your card out and punch in, "It's my job, but I do belong to the union." Men, I tell you what, if you go about your job properly and you take care of your ladies, and you love them and you're gentle, and you're caring, and you express the longsuffering and the love, and all of the attributes Jesus shows us, you're not going to have any problems, when you prefer one another, when you seek the edification of one another; this is the approach that we have in our physical relationships as well as our emotional relationships; so we see this then as part of that.

Let me go on to one other area--I know I'm fragmenting these things a little more right now because of time, but I want to touch something else as we look at these different things. We're talking about men and the distractions in these different areas that we have. The question comes up constantly in our midst here about modesty and the way the ladies in our fellowship dress and these different areas. Let me speak toward that for just a moment. Turn over to Timothy and let's see what the Holy Spirit says as it pertains to you ministering to one another and having a concern for the community, but at the same time understanding the relationships that husbands and wives have. Ladies, you might not like the way some of the other ladies dress, but their husband likes it, and they are dressing for their husbands. Now we've addressed this before, but I'll speak toward it again. Ladies, you don't dress for ladies, and that's the problem. So much of our fashion today ladies dress for ladies, it's like a competition dictated to by fashion and trend and all of these different things. Now men, if you are wise, you'll be aware of these things and things that your ladies enjoy and like and that they are drawn to, and choose your personal preferences within whatever some of the trends are that are biblically acceptable, because you want to allow them to enjoy and appreciate these things also. What am I saying? Some of you ladies are really going to get upset with me when I say this. Go with your wives. You ladies are saying, "Dear God, everything my husband buys me I take back." Wrong move! He could start buying them for somebody else. "Well my husband likes this, but I like this." Oh, you like you better than your husband then. You are dressing for your husband, amen? There's one weak, "Amen." That's what it's all about, and if you don't, you're going to be sorry! So modesty, when the Scripture speaks of modesty--go with me to Timothy if you would for just a moment, 1 Timothy, Chapter 2, [verse 8] he's talking about getting ready to go into the qualifications of the bishopric and he's giving admonitions to the call of God on our lives, and in the midst of all this he establishes his apostolic role, and then he gives some counsel here to women, he said after making this statement, "I will therefore that men pray every where, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting. [You say, "Well praise God, that's quite a spiritual statement!] In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel..." [So he's contrasting now the ladies, with his desire that men pray everywhere, lifting up holy hands without wrath and doubting, so let's talk about that for just a moment. When we begin to, and we've talked about this before, when we begin to talk about the adorning and modesty, we're talking about things that are very closely related. We're seeing here that it's really talking about orderly (okay?), so let's look at the proper order. Modest apparel. The way, ladies, that you're supposed to dress, doesn't start with how much you cover up and how much you don't cover up; it starts with, who is the Lord of your life? The honoring of the Lord Jesus, and the honoring of your head, your husband, so when we talk about modest here, we're not just talking about a modesty based upon the perception of whether or not it is seductive; we're talking about whether it's in the proper order, and the proper order is first of all that that is approved by your head, your husband. Anything that your husband doesn't approve of is immodest, it's not in proper order. So as he's speaking here, he talks about that modesty, and then that next word, shamefacedness, begins to speak toward some of these things that have to do with seductiveness, it has to deal with that that is not extreme. Shamefacedness here is talking about humility. Look at what he's going to contrast it with in just a moment,] "...Shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; But which becometh women professing godliness with good works. Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety."

Now, let me finish with this for this evening, as we're talking about modesty and these different aspects, we're talking about orderly, we're talking about under the headship of Jesus, under the headship of the husband, we're talking about with a humility, because he contrasts it here with, look, the haughtiness, the pride, the putting worth in the outward rather than the inward. He says, "Here's what is immodest," look at it, "a woman without good works." You see, it's not exactly the style we're looking at, but what he's saying is, "If you're spending all your time putting your hair up..." And he's talking about some elaborate hairdos at this particular time--you can look it up and do some study on the culture. But you know they would spend hours, and hours, doing their hair and interweaving threads of gold and pearls. And you can see it really going crazy the same type of principles in some of the courts of the French, and some of them that would have these wild hairdos and even bird cages in them and all of this kind of stuff. But we're looking at the hair and all of the gold and pearls and the costly array, and they would come to church, and this one would try to outdo that one, and the next week this one would wear the more expensive gown, and then the next week this one does, and this one has to compete, and they are there trying to be seen physically. And he's saying, "You should be known for your good works." What's he saying here? If your spirituality and your works overshadow what you are wearing, you are in good shape. If people see your heart, Christ-likeness, if they see your good works, if they see you humbly serving and bearing one another's burdens, they are not going to be taken up with what you are wearing. This isn't saying, "Don't wear nice clothes," anymore than James is saying that; what James says is, "Don't give the rich preferential treatment. Don't take the rich man and say, ‘Come here and sit in the front,' and to the poor guy, ‘Get off, man, get over here and sit on the floor.'" He's not talking about not being rich, he's not talking about not wearing good things; he says, "Don't let that be what you're trusting in, don't let that be what you are showing, but be known for your meek and quiet spirit, be known for your good works." Ladies, that's what modesty is, that's the proper order.

Well, what about in the sense that we think of modesty in our day? What is modest? I'm not sure if I could tell you what's modest, but I'm pretty sure I can tell you what's immodest; I know immodesty when I see it. What am I saying? We can't set up a lot of arbitrary rules because they are going to be as diverse as every one of us in the room. Now we have to protect our men, our young men, and our men in general; so we can't, ladies, you ladies, that are to be adorned with a meek and quiet spirit, and those of you that are to be known for your good works and humility and service. The fact that certain trends are around, we can't be taken with those things. If the mini skirt starts coming back, we can't be taken with that, we're not going to dress that way here, because you know there is another orderly aspect of this immodesty. What's orderly to your head, your husband, and how he might like you to dress, may be in conflict with what's orderly here to the community and how we have to be concerned with everybody as a whole. Your husband may enjoy seeing you in such and such a thing, but if it begins to be an area that could be a stumbling block to somebody else, then it needs to be taken into consideration. So in our society today, what are we looking at? We're living in the hour of the belly button, the one-eyed monster; the fad is to show your belly button. We could put an end to that, I know some good old boys that we should just have wear some of those [bare] midriffs and that will turn you off to belly buttons for the rest of your life: The Bubba button. But that's where we're living today, so now we see these midriffs and the belly buttons and all of those different things, and that's not by accident. The Scripture talks about, if you read the Song of Solomon, it talks about the seductiveness of that area and the different things, and the appeal.

So they are out there after your husbands and your young men, these whorish women; the guys are like dumb oxen, the Scripture says, and there's a dart that's going to pierce their liver. So how do we do? We have to protect ourselves and we're sure not going to bring it into the house of God, amen? We're not going to bring it into the fellowship; that's why some of the people say, "How come all of the different rules here?" That's why, because there's an order, and we're concerned for the whole, so that's why we try to look at different basic things. We're living today where many of you girls, you women, many of the form-fitting, these different things that are on today, you need to understand that these can be things that are troubling and a problem to men, so be considerate and try to dress accordingly. At the same time, if the person is having trouble with lust you can come in here in a cardboard box and the dude will find something to lust over, so we try to find that balance. I just want you to understand, modesty isn't based upon any individual's perception, but it has to do with order, that order is set by God as it is clearly stated in the Scriptures, anything that we can find as clear biblical reference, and then it's by the husband, and then it's by the oversight as it pertains to a community such as this, and so it has to do, not with every individual's perception, but God's structure and His order of headship, and that's what makes it acceptable. So those are things we have to contend with.

Let's go ahead and pray. We'll take a few minutes and just fellowship around the Lord's table and honor Him. I don't know how much longer we're going to-- It's interesting that we're going to transition from adultery to divorce, and He ties the two together, because He says there's really only one acceptable reason that I will allow divorcement and that's because of adultery. We see then the consequence of pornea, fornication, adultery in the church. Why are we even taking time and going through these things? It's because it's where we are living, and though it hasn't yet affected us as a fellowship the way it has affected so many because of our emphasis on holiness all these years, we are not immune, we are not immune! So we need to guard ourselves and protect ourselves--its divide and conquer that Satan uses. He's going to try to break up marriages, he's going to try to cause breaches in relationships here through this disorderly involvement. We're going to guard ourselves, we're just not going to think, "Oh yeah, it's running rampant in the world, but somehow we're immune." We are not, we are at war; we need to be aware and prepare ourselves and know. "Well you know so-and-so is such a good brother and he's full of the Spirit." Yes he is, praise God! Thank God for it, but in me, that is in my flesh, dwells what? Does that mean we are to be suspicious of everybody and be on guard? I'm not saying that, but I'm saying give no place to the devil, amen? David was a good man, but because of his lust, because of one moment, because of a bad decision, because of being in a place he shouldn't have been, ended up killing a good man. A good man killed a good man and experienced the judgment of God. Why? Because of idleness. Because of being isolated. I wonder where his wife was? "Well he couldn't sleep, he was concerned with the war that was going on; he was bothered." Then why don't you wake up your wife and say, "I can't sleep, I'm bothered, let's pray. Would you walk with me? Let's talk." We've been given life's mates, spouses, helpmeets to include them in our lives, not exclude them, that's what God's called us to, and that's what Father meant when He said, "It's not good for man to be alone."

Let's just stand before the Lord and take a moment and--I'm trying to keep it as practical as I can, beloved, to try to help us understand. I want to tell you something. When your husband's away all day, then don't you be running around with your lady friends and running and following your hobby and doing different things when he's at home. How much time do you have to be together and do you use it? "Well this is my only time I have for me." Who said you're to have only time for me, who told you that? "Well Doctor Betty." Crocker? If you wanted to be alone, then you should be alone. "You mean we can't have any time to ourselves?" I'm not saying that, beloved; I'm talking about the trends, I'm talking about the abuses, I'm talking about caring for one another, and protecting one another, and edifying one another, and preferring one another, because anything less than that is using one another, and that comes into the defrauding and the usurping and the other areas we've addressed.

Father, we just thank You that as we get ready to approach this table tonight, we have the perfect example, the perfect husband in Jesus. We as the bride, we as the love of Your life, we know what it means to have You always working for our good, and caring and being long suffering, and gentle, and full of tender mercies. You stood in the gap, You protected us from the destroyer, You ransomed us with Your own life; help us to love our wives that way, Father. Lord, as Your bride, as Your church, as Your body, we don't live for ourselves; we only are fulfilled when we are pleasing You. The whole duty of man, to love You, to fear You, to keep Your commandments, we live for You! Make it real we ask, Father, and then cause it to be transferred into our natural relationships.

I just don't--we're not going to take communion, I feel like we're almost at a place of going through the motions and we just want to honor the Lord. So we're just going to put this off until Wednesday--by then the wine should be fermented. But I want us to go with our minds on what we heard today and a purpose to honor God and to serve one another, and to prefer one another, and to fulfill our roles in protecting one another.

Father, we just ask for that anointing, that understanding, that You might be all in all. Cause it to be a reality to us, Father; cause us to not just blow this thing off but to understand the magnitude of not doing what's right. Many have fallen, many mighty men have fallen. Help us to gird ourselves up in this day, in this generation, and we'll give You the praise for it, Father, in Jesus' name, amen. Before you go, turn to somebody and say, "You're not your own," praise God! Go in peace, God's love go with you.

Back to Top | Audio   |   Purchase Audio   |   Bible Teachings   |   Print